MY TRUTH

              Scent of flowers by Luda Angel                   http://www.ebsqart.com/Art-Galleries/Artistic-Nudes/22/Scent-of-flowers/658467/

The truth in me were you
and how you saw me.
You were my choice;
my audacious, 
mistimed,
short-lived,
although beautiful choice.

I'll never call 
the acceptance
of the beauty and
of the sincerity
a lie.
I wanted to live with you
every second which I experienced,
for as long we both needed it.

I picked the flower 
impulsively,
I enjoyed its aroma,
its dazzling details,
just believing in 
the eternity of that moment,
in nothing else.

Who doesn't know that a bud
will flourish, will give its scent
will reveal its splendid core
and then will wither?
Who dares
to ignore the almightiness of an end?
Who ever called rememberance a fraud?

I am what I lived in and you
stood in the eye of my life's cyclone.
I love you because 
you deprived me of nothing 
which I craved for
I love you because
you let me dream
every night in your aura.
Even when you are not here.

DISINTEGRATION

http://www.flickr.com/photos/toshsuo/6688564515/sizes/z/in/photostream/

Solitary oak,
struck by lightning,
I can not stand to outface you
lifting up branches,
deepening roots in soil
and me, a filthy earth's mushroom,
to suck the rotten from the yellow leaves,
to decompose dead members
of lush memories.
I yearn to be a bird
chirping up in your branches,
enjoying your rustling  in the wind,
although  I will be it never.

Maybe  you still need me

to fertilize you and feed you.

Truffles and chanterelles around
will nourish you.

I belong to the family of Amanitas
being fully aware
of the hallucinations and damages, I can cause.

Let me be wilted, let me be self-absorbed.
Otherwise, I cannot 
uproot you from my inner self.
As long as my soul lives, you're mirroring it.

ON THE THRESHOLD

http://www.buamai.com/image/36514

Why are you standing on the doorway?
Why don't you talk to me?
Why don't you talk to me?
My eardrums are broken by your silence.
Neither Hello, neither Good bye.

That's enough!
I want to pass out...

Ach dear, if you only stop me
Ach dear, if you were keeping the door locked!
I've never been worthy for this...

I'm a nothing which exploded
I'm waiting stoically to become nothing again.
The Universe is still waiting though...

CLICK!

Cowards! Cowards!

I'm tired of opening my arms to the betrayal.

Of keeping my ears tightly sealed to lies.

Of accepting weakness.

Of being ridden by the incapacity.

Of proving the obvious.

Of failing in, failing in, failing in

and of giving, giving, giving ...

until finally the offering hand is bitten 

deadly, estoppel

absolutely without hearing any apology.

As if everything was good and well done.

"Spray, wipe, you're done!"

Press the button, power off! Whew!

What can I do

if I do not believe that

they will be punished by good God one day?

What else?

The poor sucker sits down and cries ...

©CHRYSSA VELISSARIOU

A SMALL MOURNING

Caracalla (Altes Museum, Berlin)

So dear, you know I'm weeping because 

I did not see you as the important man you are

I did not want you for your credentials

I did not need you to serve my arrogance and ambitions

I did believe you were my destiny

I did love you

You were simply my wolfy

And this did not even cross your mind...

So dear, you know I'm weeping

I am mourning for you

And I also pity you.

Strange...

THE GIRL ( IN MEMORIAL OF MY WOLF)

Spiritual mating! 

I felt you so close 

I was so open 

so given 

Lightening love 

against all my life's burning Eros 

A black girl with hazel eyes 

and long dark ebonish brown hair 

Fed by my breasts milk 

feeding your needs 

Rising to the stars 

your pledge for togetherness 

your worshiping to a goddess 

of Joy 

of Peace and 

of Affection 

What an amazing Vision!

SUMMARY II

http://old.wallcoo.net/paint/kb_Josephine_Wall-2002_Celestial_Journeys_Calendar/html/image16.html

Gone even this hope.
From here on,
to where I desire,
I will go alone.

Why should I look for you,
you didn't ask .
Life tought to me this
is big mistake.

And all this, I have built,
and stay there
right behind  me will
be my backup.

Eventually the truth
is not what's 
happening, but what
is left to you.

IN PLATO'S CAVE

Even if these years
blindly studying geometry
of ignorant soul

the life's mysteries
through a laboratory tube
I tried to know.

Even if I thought
happiness I 'll find, staying
in life's shadow.

Only when you  have 
blinded me, Sun of Eros,
Knowledge I saw.

Even if bitter
death's hemlock I had to taste,
I 'll glow like torch.

SELF-CONSUMPTION

SELF-CONSUMPTION

I am a difficult case.
I can not hate.
No one.
I can not take revenge.
Because I do not see
what the enemy is doing against me
but what made him do it.
There is always a good explanation
why people hurt each other.
I don't want to hurt no one
even if I'm hurt by him.
I try to be fair to everyone else
except to myself.
So who's going to defend me?
I am not virtuous at all!
In fact my greater sin 
is that I do not protect myself
from dying, from suffocation
in this refuse dump of human kind
wherein I'm living.
I'm the creating power, 
in slavery though.
Time to get rid of my inhibitions,
no more time to waste.
Time to break through the walls 
of my imprisoning "protectors".

EVE

Keith Howard, "Angry Eve" oil painting on canvas 24" x 96" (detail)

Look at me

Look at me closely
I am an ordinary woman
A working woman
A creative woman
I am a mother
a friend
a lover